When The At Home Office Becomes
the Out of Home Office
Yep, that used to be me (well, not really me – it’s some lady in a stock photo)…working at home on the couch, at the kitchen table, sometimes in my office and often in bed.
Everything was going smoothly and I was really into the groove of my work at home lifestyle, easily balancing the family and business aspects of my life.
Then new (and great) things happened in life – causing a little turmoil in the once delicate balance.
- Baby #3, and our first daughter, was born.
- My husband came home full-time.
- My youngest son started kindergarden (2 1/2 hours Mon-Fri)
- My oldest son started grade 2 (9-3 Mon-Fri)
This meant a busy household. Between tending to babies needs, going back-and-forth to school 3 times per day…there were a lot of interruptions. My husband took care a lot of these things, but there was still so much going on in this house at any given moment (baby crying, baby needing feeding, sons coming and going, etc.), that it became difficult to concentrate on work.
I always find it very stressful (on me and the family) when trying to work and attend to their needs at the same time. I am distracted and don’t always hear my kids asking for something – and then they’d get frustrated because they’d think I was ignoring them. Where possible, I like to keep work and family completely separate and I was able to do that previously because my husband was at work all day, my oldest was in school all day and my youngest went to full-day preschool a few days per week.
So….to help with my new situation, here what I did…
At first I tried to just work nights, but I hate working nights and was just making myself more exhausted than productive.
Then I started heading out for a few hours at a time, to local restaurants, Starbucks, etc. and used their wi-fi. I actually enjoyed this and got a decent amount of work done, but there were a few issues. I ate too much and was tempted by all the rich menu choices. It was expensive…not only did I pay for eating out, in many cases, I had to pay for wi-fi. Plus, I always gave big tips because I was a single person, occupying a table for a while. I had to move around every couple hours as I didn’t want to overstay my welcome in any one place.
Then I realized I needed a dedicated work space and a dedicated time, so I…
Started renting an office inside my mother-in-law’s travel agency. Yep, I’m renting an out of home office (and there’s my other stock photo self working hard in the office on the left). Now, I go to the office three times per week and get work done. I do two full days and one half day – totalling approximately 20 hours per week and all during daytime hours. And although I miss my little baby and my youngest when he comes home from kindergarden, I’m fully dedicated to them when I come home.
I know everybody finds their own work-at-home groove and many wouldn’t choose what I chose, but my working style and preferences really dictated it. If I was going to keep balancing work and life, this is what had to happen.
Now, when my son starts a full day of school and my infant daughter is a bit older and out-and-about more, I may change my plan again. But for now, this works for all of us.
And ahem…if you’ll excuse me…I’m heading home from the office now. Talk to you later.
Are Thinking of Working from Home?
I know a lot of my readers already work from home and have an established business, but if you’re still thinking about it – here’s a little work at home quiz that might help you figure some things out and see what you might be most suitable for.
About: Alice Seba
Alice Seba earns a full-time online income as an entrepreneur and loves to help others achieve the same. With a focus on using content to create relationships, loyalty and results from the written word, she co-owns both a ghostwriting service and a private label content business. To get more tips for your content marketing, visit Contentrix.com - your free resource with plenty of tips and strategies.Freebies
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geekmom
I’ve always thought about getting an office outside the home just for the sanity end of it. My kids are all in school, but there are times at night when I have to work where I find it impossible! I hope you enjoy your office.
Edie McRae
Way to go Alice! I know what a tough decision that was to make because I had to make it too. 6 years ago, I left my full time nursing job to become a full time work at home mom. At that time my chosen poison was direct sales. Little did I know that working from home was going to be the toughest balancing act I could have imagined. I too remember wearing a head-set (couldn’t afford a wireless one in those days) talking to customers, changing diapers, fixing dinner, emailing, networking online–I’m exhausted just thinking about it! I drove myself and my family crazy! I much prefer having true “office hours” now that my boys are in school full time. During the summer months, my family pitches in with child care so that I can get work done uninterrupted. I’m much more productive this way. And I’m a lot closer to being sane! lol… Thanks for sharing this because too many of us “work at home moms” are afraid to admit that it’s not all sunshine and roses.
Paul
That story sure has a familiar ring to it . . .
I’ve been working at home since 1999 . . . it was easy at first, because it was just my wife and me. In the 10 years since then we’ve added 4 kids to our household. AND a dog (lest we forget!)
I have my own office with a locking door, but all too often I’m the weak link — when my 14 month daughter is standing at the hallway gate saying “Daddy! Daddy!”, it’s terribly difficult to not reward her (and myself!) with some daddy-daughter time!
I’ve mentioned the idea of renting an office here in town (I bet it would be less than $300/month), but my wife isn’t having any of that — it’s just too darn convenient to have me in the house when she wants to run errands and leave the older kids home. (They are old enough to pretty much take care of themselves, but still young enough there needs to be an adult in the house at least.)
I know my productivity suffers as a result, but that’s a small sacrifice for all the memories I’d otherwise miss out on — you just can’t find a good substitute for a daughter’s hugs and kisses!
Best,
Paul
Anna
Wow, you have a very busy home life. Tough call but I’m sure it will save your sanity. I don’t even have children but a very demanding cat. I find I get a lot more work done when I go to the public library (free wi-fi) and I don’t have all the distractions from home.
Rose Mendolera
You have to do what’s best for you and your family. I’m not a complete work-at-home mom. My chuildren are grwon, but I am dedicated to helpong other children as a Teaching Assistant. So I go to work and I come home to work. I applaud your decision and admire you for all your ideas and tips! Sincerely, Rosie
Dr. Dax
Alice,
YOU RULE!!!
I appreciate the fact that you expained this situation.
Surely, there are a few hundred of your subscribers
facing the same at-home delimma—being the Strong One
of the family, and getting everything done without
complete chaos erupting.
Yes, thank you for sharing this. It will keep others in like situations
from giving up on their at-home careers.
Suzanne
God, Alice, you are so smart. You don’t have to apologize to ME for your wise choices. It does help to have an understanding spouse, too. For years I’ve been dealing with driving my kids everywhere. I have 3 also, each spaced 3 years apart, with very different interests. They’re in 3 different schools, with 3 different start & end times, plus getting them to afterschool activities. I keep saying my business has the potential to make a lot of money (which it does), and that once it does, I’ll just hire their father (my ex) as their chauffer. For now he’ll pick them up sometimes at the end of his day, but often not, and there are literally days I’ll spend over 6 hours on the road, in scattered blocks chopping up the day. Then people wonder (and pass judgement) that my car is falling apart, and full of crumbs from feeding people in it between destinations.
But then there are events like today – my older son, on the road between baseball practice and chorus rehearsal told me “Je t’aime.” It’s nice to be appreciated sometimes
My other son is studying robotics, and I keep telling him I want him to help design the cars of the future that will drive themselves — then the roads will be filled will preprogrammed empty cars driving to schools to pick kids up….
So, Alice, you are preaching to the choir with me!!
Serena Carcasole
Alice,
This is awesome!! I admire you for that. I only have 1 child and she is in school half days. It takes up a lot of time and I end up working day and night. If I am not in my ofice I am working on my laptop in the family room. She will be in school full time in 1 1/2 years so I will have full days to my self however we are not sure if we are going to have another baby by then and if that is the case I WILL NEED MY OUT OF THE HOME OFFICE TOO!! lol
Congrats!
Serena Carcasole
www.vbsondemand.com
Your 1STOP Business Service Shop
Outsource your way to success!
Kelli Claypool
Alice,
I’m thrilled to see that you’ve made the decision to have complete balance. Women business owners struggle immensely when it comes to finding time for their families and their business. You’ve taken the opportunity to leverage yourself so that you can maximize your business time versus your family time.
I’m sure this was, initially, a tough decision to make and one that I think deserves a huge kudos! Thank you for sharing!
Always,
Kelli
Dominique
Alice,
Its great that you manage to find time and space for both work and family. I too found it diffiult to focus on the tasks at hands when the kids were at home 24/7 with me.
Rod
I find the real lesson for me is that you were persistent until you found what really worked for you… Way to go!
It really can be a balancing act. It is all worth it!
Debi
It sound like everyday lifestyle, but if your doing well enough for your husband to be home to help balance to work load, and you would like to be that stay at home mom, have you thought about hiring a nanny to come in to pick up household needs & children for a few hours a week. it would cost you about the same as what your paying for that rented space.
Alice Seba
from Alice Hey guys – thanks for your thoughts and your experiences. They mean a lot to me.
For the record, I’m not apologizing and not seeking any alternative. At the moment, this works best for all of us.
Hi Debi – A nanny would just mean another person in this busy household. My husband does take care of the kids during the day – it’s just massive distraction in this place. Also, my office is cheap. I pay the favorite daughter-in-law rate.
Plus, I forgot to mention (as a few have mentioned their pets) we also have 2 dogs, a cat and about 16 fish.
Sharon Hoehner
Twitter: detoxqueen
Alice, I applaud you. It’s not easy to leave the kids at home but it’s even worse to do a “half-job” as a parent. I wish I had done this a few years ago rather than ignoring my daughter part of the time and not really paying attention to anything fully. Working at home is not always a good solution. We’ll be moving soon and the next place needs to have a section of the home that’s separate for me only or else I’ll be working like you too! Thanks for sharing and all the best!
Hugs to you,
Sharon
Beth
Alice,
Thank you so much for your sharing your story of how you decided on getting an office outside the home. Many adults will relate to what you have been experiencing, and even though everyone has their own unique situation it is so helpful to see different options that are possible. Although a few people will think that you should have stayed home or not worked at all , many more will be applauding you for doing what is right for you.
I know that some people simply are more productive if they leave home and are in a professional setting. Pets,kids,spouses, the Fed EX and UPS men, and many other distractions make your choice an understandable and intelligent one.
Also, I believe you are setting an example for your children. They will understand that there is a time to work and a time that you really are truly there from them instead of worn-out and your mind somewhere else. They will appreciate that you fully pay attention to them when you come home. I’ll bet it takes less hours also, since you can truly focus on the tasks at hand!
There are some people who can thrive in a home office setting. Realistically though, I think most people that start working from home spend a lot of time adjusting to the distractions and figuring out the way to be most productive. Quite a few have neighbors or relatives who don’t take their businesses seriously and think that they can phone or drop in at any time at all. All of the distractions I mentioned are real issues that must be dealt with in order to be able to successfully build the business and have an income.
I applaud your honesty and openness at sharing. It would be great if others would share their stories and what has worked, or not worked for them. Inquiring minds want to know!
sleep problems
I always wondered how you managed all that you do. My daughter has 1 baby a year old and she works from home too. She hired a nanny who comes to the house 3 days a week. She completely takes over looking after Mia. This arrangment works really well.
I had 3 children and I have no idea how I could have fitted anything more demanding than housework around them when they were little.
Hiring an office is a really good solution and will make a break for you between work and home which is bound to be good. I wish yo all the best.
Liz
Tawnya Sutherland
Alice, so glad to hear you are doing this and how exciting for you! I know many home based entrepreneurs that have went this route for many different reasons and loved every minute of their home office outside of home! You’ll be soon producing all kinds of new products for us now so I’m saving up my moola for it
My kids are all grown up now so working from home is best option for me although I plan on traveling more and working virtually from whatever city I’m visiting in the near future.
I have to ask, did you go out and buy a new office wardrobe yet and if not, why not….you’ve got justification to buy new clothes !!!
Alice Seba
from Alice: You guys are awesome. So many perspectives and additional things to think about. Not to brag, but I’ve got some pretty smart blog readers.
To Tawnya: No, not a new wardrobe, but a new Spring coat. It makes a difference in confidence though and just getting that “working feeling”…LOL. Maybe some additional items soon. I don’t get too dressed up as I’m happiest in jeans, but a nice top and cool boots/shoes are always up my alley.
Polly Pierce
Alice, you always come up with such practical solutions to every challenge. It certainly does sound as though your household is a busy one.
I can’t imagine how you managed before you took up occupation at your out of home home office desk! I guess this way you CAN give the kids your full attention when you are at home, which is great and of course one of the many reasons for working at home.
Sadly though, I’ve noticed in my own life that this is very difficult to follow through on when you’re surrounded by the trappings of work. Inevitably work invades your social space and becomes the focus in life, rather than that all important family.
Presently it’s too cold to use my home office/studio for much more than storage so not only is the computer in a corner of our bedroom, there is crafting stuff all over the house! We can’t even sit down to watch TV together without me making a card or two…
Treece
Smart decision. There is a point where you realize that you need to have quality working time, not just quantity. The reality is, when you are truly working you may be physically “there” for your children, but not emotionally. Kids don’t want to be told to go away by their moms, no matter what age. Separating work from home can benefit both. The joys of being self-employed – you can still choose to stay home whenever you want, whether you have a sick kid, a lighter work load, a snow day, or just feel like not heading to the office. You can choose your own hours, your own days, and your own work schedule. Now that’s what I call freedom.
As your children grow, you can adjust accordingly.
Sharon
I relate Alice…I’ve often said to my husband when I come home full time (I work out of the home during the day and on my business at night) that I’m going to take an “out of home office.” Mine would be at neat location about 9 minutes from our home…my parent’s home! Even now, whenever I need some quiet time now…that’s where my family can find me
Felicia - I Complete Me
I really wish I was able to work from home, but I do realize that I need an office to work in and out of so that I can get some work done. It’s very easy to get distracted by household chores, baby, and tv. So maybe if I bring in enough income I can move from working for someone to working for myself and am able to rent office space myself.
Peggy Dallmann
Hi, Alice,
I so understand where you are coming from when you told us how you couldn’t hear your children asking for something, and then they think you have ignored them. I don’t have young children at home, but I have a dog. When the dog comes into the office, she will whine for attention. Sometimes she just wants a pat, but other times she wants out or needs something else (like food, imagine that). Now, please understand I am a good pet owner. But sometimes it takes a good five minutes before I register the fact that she’s running around behind me whining. Sometimes she just comes up to the side of me and sticks her face up in mine to get my attention. Anyway, my point is that I feel bad even inadvertently ignoring my sweet dog. I can imagine that it’s much worse with one’s children. Good luck. Sounds like you made a wise decision. Plus, you may find you are getting more work done in less time, and that you can really enjoy your children when you are away from your business because you won’t be tempted or feel a tug to go back to your computer.
Peggy
Eren Mckay
I so completely understand why you have chosen to do this. Kids don’t have the maturity especially at a young age to know that “mommy is working”.
Now that my kids are 8, 10 and 11 things are much much better than when they were younger. I have spoken a lot with them and explained a lot of things. But when they were little I couldn’t even get 2 minutes to eat let alone work for hours.
Great idea
Blessings,
Eren Mckay
Suzanne
Hey Eren, That’s what bathroom door locks are for! Blahahahaha
(Ok, just kidding.)
Eren Mckay
LOL Suzanne- yeah I did away with our bathroom doors (that locked) after my kids locked themselves in the bathroom once— hee hee. Never wanna go through that again.
Now I have a curtain on one bathroom and and slide non lockable door on the other one.
I do have a lock on my bedroom door though
Blessings,
Eren Mckay
Fitness is cool
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine
… really all joking aside you are the one that shows us that it really is a matter of staying on target making adjustment as we go.