Beating Back Discouragement

Hello Sweetie readers!

Before I dig into the topic of this post, I want to take a second to introduce myself and tell you about how I came to know the illustrious Ms. Seba.

6 years ago when I built my first website (one of those point and click type of things), I decided to try making a little more money with it. At the time I was hosting these offline events for women in direct sales, but I knew that people were somehow making money with their websites - even when they didn’t have a physical product to sell.

Now I now know that’s affiliate marketing, but I had to learn that! It was a Google search that led me to one of Alice’s sites way back then, and it (and her) have been a wonderful source of inspiration and information ever since. Another thing I happened to stumble on was the power of the press release. Again, thanks to Ms. Seba and her free press release template, I found myself (and my website) on the front page of my local newspaper.

I’m very thankful for that bit of serendipity! Now that you know a little bit about how I ended up being a Sweetie devotee, on to the topic of Discouragement.

I don’t think I’m assuming when I say that every online business owner experiences discouragement from time to time. Even the most successful online entrepreneur has setbacks and frustration.

The difference between those that keep plugging on and those that give up (other than a stubborn streak!) is that those who persist have learned not to let discouragement get the better of them. I’m no stranger to discouragement either. I have learned a few things that have helped me keep discouragement from making me want to give up, and hopefully sharing these will help you too.

Don’t Compare Yourself with Others
Because I have 4 kids and have also chosen to homeschool my crew, I’ve had to be content with my business growing a little more slowly than other women who may have more time to work their businesses (or more money to invest in its growth). In the past when I’ve observed moms who launch their business and start earning a full time income within several months, I have to admit I’ve felt a twinge of envy. I have had to remind myself that we’re all on a different track and that we all come to our business with a different set of skills and circumstances.

The takeaway message is that if you find yourself comparing your results to another, train yourself to stop it! You WILL meet your goals if you keep at it. If you had told me a couple of years ago that I would be supporting my family as a single mom with my business, I probably wouldn’t have believed you - but here I am doing it. So instead of feeling envious, learn from what others are doing. Network with them, ask questions, observe, interview them on your website! It’s a far more productive use of your time and energy.

It’s Ok To Ask For Help
During my time at Mom Masterminds, I’ve noticed that most of the members there get to a point in their business where they are quite discouraged and desperate to get to the next level. At that point they will post a very heartfelt message asking for the community to give them suggestions and assistance. This is really exciting to see. Not only does it give the rest of the community a chance to help out (and we all love to help other people when we can) but it shows that everyone, no matter how shiny and happy their business or life appears, has bad times.

While no one would take you seriously if you were having a crisis every week, reaching out to your network can produce powerful results. It can remind you that you have far more resources available to you than you thought, and that’s a big discouragement fighter. It can also help you see that you have more value than you might realize. If all these other people you admire and respect are willing to promote you, perhaps you haven’t been promoting yourself enough.

It’s Not About The Business
Remember that your business is just one aspect of your life. If the real problem is your marriage or your health or poor money management, then deal with THAT. The results you get from your business might be showing up the stresses and strains of some other issue in your life.

In addition, if you have a real mood disorder then take care of yourself and get help from a trusted health care provider. It might be as simple as getting out in the sun more and exercising and eating better (instead of spending so much time in front of the computer!) or it might be more serious, but either way have it checked out.

Celebrate Your Successes
One of the reasons why it’s easy for me now to give negative thoughts the boot is because I have a catalog of successes in my mind to draw from. If you’re still in the early days of your business, you might want to keep a success journal. Just write down somewhere every time you achieve some goal for yourself. Brag a little on a forum where other people can high five you virtually. This way when you have a bad day, you can recall these things to mind and it will give you the strength to keep going.

Get Into Action
Finally, I find that the best antidote to feelings of discouragement is action. Instead of giving in to your feelings and slowing down (as if you’re waiting for good things to show up?), get really busy.

The menfolk please pardon my illustration but for the ladies who understand - it’s kind of like those pushing contractions. When you finally get permission to start pushing against the labor pains instead of passively “relaxing”, doesn’t it feel great? (Sorry, I find labor and birth to be an excellent metaphor for many things!)

Maybe your business is going through a bad patch because you’ve not been taking enough action, or not taking the right kinds of action. This is where coaching can be really helpful.

Hopefully these tips will help you fight discouragement so you can keep going until you meet your business goals. If you have any tips to share please leave them in the comments!

And thanks to Alice for letting me guest blog while she finishes brewing that baby